Saturday, 10 October 2009

Nobel Prize in Economics awarded to Timothy Milner

The final Nobel Prize to be awarded in 2009, the Sveriges Riksbank Prize in Economic Sciences in Memory of Alfred Nobel, was awarded today to Timothy Milner of the University of Idaho.

Timothy ("Timbo" to his friends) was awarded the prize for his outstanding accomplishments with respect to envisioning a tree that grows money. The "money tree", as he calls it, would help developing nations purchase "lots of food and stuff" because they would no longer be reliant on loans from the EMF or other countries. "Not only that, it would be drought resistant, so poor countries could still buy stuff if it doesn't rain."

"We thought it was brilliant." said Karl-Göran Mäler, chairman of the Nobel Prize Committee at the Stockholm School of Economics. "Now, some people might say that an inexhaustible supply of money would ignite hyper inflation, but seriously, nobody believes that monetarist shit anymore."

When asked why they didn't wait for him to actually create a money tree before awarding the prize, Karl-Göran responded: "We just thought that the idea was so profound that it would change the way we think about international finance, so we wanted to put a spot light on it as soon as possible. I mean, can you imagine? A tree that grows money? That would be so cool." In response to further criticism, he added: "plus, he has a cute ass."

Timothy was gracious in his acceptance speech: "This is so awsome. I mean, I'm just a guy with an idea, but I never thought that posting my idea on Facebook would result in a $1.5m prize. I am soooo going to have a kick-ass kegger this weekend!"

c/p Dust My Broom

4 comments:

  1. Scott MacNeil10 October 2009 at 02:01

    What's it that all the cool kids say again? Err... um... oh I know: LAUGH OUT LOUD! Yes, that's it - laugh-out-loud indeed! Ha, 'money tree' ... how rich!

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  2. unclebob10 October 2009 at 07:58

    And as soon as I harvest the first tree I am going to donate an equivalent of all that prize money to charity.

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  3. Prairie Topiary10 October 2009 at 15:22

    Hilarious!

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  4. Tractor13 October 2009 at 09:56

    ... and the Nobel prize for literature goes to my Uncle Reg, who has this great idea for a book -- 400 pages, strong melancholy heroine, something about colonization and identity, sexual inadequacy as a metaphor for war. Reg promises it will make the weak strong, challenge the complacent, and uplift the downtrodden. The Nobel committee says they can't wait to read it.

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