How to sell out your blog

I received a comment on my last post from a Mr. Rob Campbell. The comment was not about my new hat, nor was it about my fuzzy belly, or Dust My Broom or anything else having to do with the blog post. Rob, who apparently has not seen The Princess Bride, wants me to email him so he can add me to his index of Canada Blog Friends.

Well shoot ... who wouldn't want to be a Canada Blog Friend? I certainly don't want to be a Canada Blog Enemy. Canada = good. Blog = good. Friend = good. Canada Blog Friend = awsome!!!

But why do I have to email him? And why does he want to add me to his list seeing as he obviously knows nothing about my blog? And why is there no mention of Canada Blog Friends on his own blog? Time to put Mrs Google to work ... (that's right: Google is a chick, didn't you know?)

I find out pretty quickly that Rob The Garbage Digger has been spamming bloggers across the country. His MO is to make some kind of complementary comment about the blog, but nothing specific that indicates that he actually read the blog. For example:

seriously I cannot believe how many blog rolls you are on. You are like the quintessential West coast female blogger in Canada.

or

This site is the best I’ve seen for NB - the quality of information here is terrific.

Now I'm actually a little pissed because he didn't even bother to complement me. Turns out "Roberriffic" is a new breed of blogshiller. He's recruiting people to post promos for shit on their blogs for $10+ per post. See here:

Calling All Canadian Bloggers! As Roberrific, I work for an innovative web design and marketing company in downtown Toronto. They have asked me to build a Canadian blog club to promote their clients nationally... now they are really keen to see bigger club.

As the new Canada 'blog friends' club has already shown enormous potential, I have been authorized to reward $10 to $80 per post.

Rob calls it Social Media Optimization or SMO. His tool: SMOJoe

He can call it whatever he wants, but I don't much like it. He can take his SMOJoes and sneezers and his peanut for that matter and stick it up his virtual ass. Rob is no friend of Canadian bogs.